Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
