I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize