So drunk its hurt
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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