is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
