therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
