Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He did a backflip because drugs
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
