I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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