how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize