I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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