Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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