ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
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