Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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