also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize