3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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