remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
