he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
