Me too!
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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