You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
