she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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