Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
