I forgot how hot balto sounded
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
