Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
she woke up with a sticky ear
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
