New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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