just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
