lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
