There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
