dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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