He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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