so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
