the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
