the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm both gender and math confused
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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