dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Randomize
