that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
