I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
