I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
