they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
