i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize