I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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