she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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