she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
