Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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