last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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