Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
