I got chris browned last night
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
No stitches, just platelets and will power
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
