what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
