hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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