of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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