I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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