you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
