She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
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