He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
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